It Started with a Journal

I've started using MyFitnessPal again. I started it like 2 years ago, used it for a bit, then stopped. After my latest doctor's appointment, I felt inspired to go back to it. I really need to lose weight. I barely recognize myself anymore! Usually when I think of dieting, I get really discouraged because it seems like some far away goal, I won't see results right away, it'll take years do undo what I've done, etc. But right now I am on a "lose 1 pound a week" plan on MFP, and I realized that that meant if I really stuck to it, I could be close to my goal weight by the end of the year! An actual, real day that's within sight! So I'm giving it a shot. I have terrible self control, so we'll see. I keep telling myself that I did it before so I can do it again, but back then I had more things going for me -- I lived in a neighborhood where I could safely take long walks, I wasn't running a food blog (there's a certain amount of pressure to, you know, be making/consuming good food when you run a food blog), and I had good distractions... namely, World of Warcraft. >.>

It's made me want to play WoW again. I know, losing weight through playing WoW is like the antithesis of the image people usually think of when they think of video gamers (see South Park's "Make Love, Not Warcraft"). But for me it worked. In order to have fun, you have to interact with the game. Your hands are kept busy. I often ate only a bit of my dinner before I'd get distracted playing, and then I felt full. It's the opposite of watching TV for me -- when watching TV, I like to be doing something else, and eating is perfect. So I just eat and eat. Portion control is very difficult when I'm watching TV -- I don't eat until I'm no longer hungry; I eat until I'm stuffed.

So I'm going to try. Keeping the fitness diary really helps because 1) seeing how many calories something is, is really an eye opener; 2) I don't want to have to add stuff to the diary; and 3) it helps me realize what '1 serving' really amounts to. Last time I cut out, like, everything that was 'bad' -- ice cream, chips, fried foods, bacon, other junk food. I'm not going to do that this time because I think it was so restrictive that I had to fall off the wagon at some point, and I want something I can keep up with long term. Then again, last time I did it not to lose weight, but to improve my cholesterol. That seems under control now (at least so says the physical that I got in September), because I've generally been eating better (just too much of it).

I want to be able to wear all those nice jeans I've unearthed in my closet! LOL.

But speaking of bacon and TV... >.> Today is the last day I'll be curing my bacon. I had enough dry cure to cure it for 6 days, so I'm stopping here. Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall (the British "meat guru" whose advice I'm taking) says that a 5-day cure is perfect for breakfast slices. Longer cures allow the bacon to last for months, but become unpalatably salty (you have to boil away some of the salt before using). I obviously don't have some drafty shed in which to hang my bacon, so I'll just have to use his alternate suggestion and keep it wrapped in cheesecloth in the fridge. I've also been reading other food blogs about homemade bacon, and there's this ultra simple method of doing it (even simpler than what I did, which was already pretty darn easy), where you just keep it in a plastic bag the whole time with the cure and flip it over every other day to redistribute the liquid (because it does release a lot of liquid). Since I had two slabs of pork belly I probably should have tried one of each method to test which was better, but oh well.

( Finished American Horror Story. Spoilery. )

( Watched through ep 4 of Downton Abbey S2. )

How awesome does the new season of Game of Thrones look?! The trailer (thank you, akscully):



Also, ropo found this for me. We'll stop by the next time we're in Vegas. In fact, I think I saw this place the last time I was there!

I don't know why I bother to play Word Twist at night. My brain is so not with it that half the time I can't even get the bonus words right, much less clear the board.

The weather is being really schizophrenic lately. It keeps pouring rain then letting some sun peep out, then pouring rain, rinse and repeat. I guess it's a good thing for the garden? My cousin has like the same things growing in her garden right now that I have in mine, so it can't be totally off base. If they don't drown from all the rain perhaps I may be able to eat something from it yet! I'm so impatient though; it's only been like 3 days and already I'm like, but they don't look any different. Where's my whole head of cabbage?

Apparently, Gourmet magazine is no more. The November issue I just got is going to be their last one. How nutty is that? It was a sudden decision I guess, and I'm relieved that I didn't renew my subscription a couple of weeks ago when a renewal notice came in. Forthcoming issues will be some other Conde Nast magazine yet to be determined. I think I'm fairly close to the 12 issues I subscribed for, not sure how many they'll need to replace, but it doesn't matter, I still feel cheated. I wanted and paid for Gourmet! Grrr. Also, what's going to happen to Ruth Reichl? I mean, I'm sure she'll land on her feet, but it's shocking that she 'failed' at something. (Not, of course, that it's all her fault, or can even be considered a failure at all, depending how you want to look at it.)

I really, really gotta go on a diet and exercise more. Not only is my cholesterol bad, my blood pressure, which has always been fine, has started to get people commenting that it's a little high. Seriously, this is really annoying. I mean, I'm not a stick to be sure, but it's not like I'm totally letting myself go. I wear like a size 6 in jeans (though I can still fit into my 4s), and while that's not as small as it used to be, it's still OK. But apparently my body requires being a stick in order to be healthy. WHICH IS SUPER ANNOYING. It goes against everything I'm a proponent of, like healthy-looking women who have fat on their bodies and don't look like all they eat a day is a carrot. However, most important to me is actually being healthy, regardless of what a person looks like. At this perfectly reasonable (imho) size, my health stats are plummeting. I realize this is not true for a lot of people. A lot of people can be a larger size and still be perfectly healthy, with good cholesterol levels and blood pressure. Apparently I am not one of those lucky people. Apparently I DO need to eat a sole carrot a day in order to be healthy. Which really effing pisses me off, because I loooooooooove to eat. I blame my mom, who also has cholesterol and blood pressure problems. I think the only decent thing I inherited from her is a fairly good metabolism.

However, the diet cannot truly start until a few weeks from now, after my mom and aunt's visit. While they're here we're sure to go to many great places to eat (yes, love of food is something else I inherited), and there's no way I have that much willpower. Stopping myself from indulging when I'm fending for myself is one thing; stopping myself when there's a banquet laid before me is another.

Maybe it'll help if I slowly give up indulgences. I'll pick a new one every week and it's gone forevermore (or you know, until this diet phase ends). Okay, so the first indulgence sacrifice is ... potato chips. Goodbye, crispy, salty, potatoey goodness. *sniff* Sandwiches will never be the same again.

Holy Moses. MSNBC’s Tamron Hall takes a look at which foods comprise the 12,000 calories Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps consumes in one day.

12,000 calories. *boggle* I mean, I know he needs it given the workout he puts his body through, but just seeing that number totally wigs me out. That's literally 10 times the number of calories I aim for per day. That is amazing. ( Oooh I found a breakdown of what he eats. )

Clearly all I need to do is work out 5 hours a day, 6 days a week, and I can eat like I've always wanted to. *dreams of what those 12,000 calories would consist of*

Tomorrow is my work BBQ (I love BBQs!), then Saturday I'm having sushi and Tropic Thunder with corianderstem! Woot.

In about 40 min I have a meeting with my manager to discuss this last year's compensation rewards (I'm going to guess ... very, very little), and then at 3pm it's off to the farmer's market for my pig fat! I can't wait! (This is not as contradictory to my need/desire to eat healthier due to bad cholesterol results as it might seem. More later.)

Edit: Wow, okay, totally unexpected. I got a promotion, lol. It was so unexpected even my manager was like, "I was surprised too!" Not due to my job performance, but because I just got one last year and it's fairly rare. Plus a decent bonus. Hmm now I have to decide what item I'm going to splurge on as a reward for myself ... oh who am I kidding, we all know it'll probably involve Louis Vuitton.